Thursday, May 20, 2010

late night worries

it's 2:16 a.m. The last time that I stayed up this late was in April the week before finals :) But this time, I'm by myself!
Mark has been asleep for the past two hours, and I wish I could have joined him!
Just some thoughts...
Lately I have been scared of being a parent. Specifically, a parent of a teenager. This is something that I can definitely wait for, and hope and pray that I have more knowledge and experience behind me to face the challenges that young people face today (duh, I was there 9 months ago).
But if this is my daughter someday, please come cry with me. 

Or if this guy claims to be my son, will I still have brown hairs on my head?! 

I just need to have faith. That's what Mark always tells me. Good thing I have him and that he puts up with me! He has so much faith and doesn't worry much about anything...he's quite the opposite of me in that respect. This is what i will look like: 

Because of these fears, I have been seriously thinking that a maximum of THREE children is sufficient for me to feel like I have "multiplied and replenished the earth", especially if I have at least one boy and one girl. Now watch, because I said that, the Big Man is going to give me three daughters or something and then I'll be forced to have another to carry on the Freeman name... Oh gosh it's just too late for this. 





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