Friday, October 14, 2011

Teaching Chronicles, Chapter 3

Ever since I began observing/teaching with my mentor teacher at Oak Canyon J.H., he has predicted that I will have "at least one meltdown" in front of my students. He said that every student teacher in his classroom has had an episode of tears, gnashing of teeth, and stress-filled resentment towards the students at one point. I have been determined to not be part of this statistic. Knowing that this would be more difficult because of the hormonal adjustments that come with carrying a child in my womb, I continue to press on hoping prove him wrong.

Yesterday was a close one! Luckily I got my tears out of the way before I walked into the school at the awful hour of 7:15 a.m. I didn't even give Mark a kiss goodbye---I knew that if I did or if he asked me what was wrong, the water works would get to the red-faced, blubbery, can't-stop-for-an-hour type of cry---so I just yelled "have a nice day" and headed out the door. I felt awful. A few tears streamed down my face, then I gave myself a pep-talk and prayed...out loud. It totally helped, and by the time I walked in to face Mr. A, I knew what I had to do to keep it together, and luckily I did! ....until after school :)

Poor Mark had to listen to all of my (b-swear word)-ing pretty much all night, sprinkled with tears here and there. He was so sweet and took me to look at couches for our living room. I felt much better after lots of hugs and kisses from him. It ended up being a great day and I'm so grateful for him.

This experience of student teaching 14 year-olds has made me a few things:
  1. Terrified of raising teenagers (some of them give me that fear...)
  2. Excited to have teenagers (some of them are great....)
  3. Motivated to be a better mommy (in 2 months!!!)
  4. Determined to raise HONEST kiddos (the cheating that goes on...!! blows my mind!)
  5. More grateful for the good teachers that I've had in my life! (It's a lot of work!)
I'll have to keep adding to that list. That's all I have for now (my brain is a little sleepy!)

I have had a few rewarding moments that make it all worth it, like that look of "OH! I GET IT!" after reviewing a geographical concept or seeing students get excited about a lecture and shoot their hands up to participate. I love watching my kids who have learning disabilities (there are many) push through their hardships and turn in work that they're so proud of. Or my English language learners be so brave and get up in front of the class to share their term projects, despite the difficulty of speaking publicly in a language so new to them. These are the things that make me excited to come to school and be with them.

I could go on and switch gears to talk about what makes me not excited, but I don't want to ruin the moment. Happy Weekend, everyone!

1 comment:

  1. Ugh...I understand! I used to tutor junior high kids after school and I COULD NOT IMAGINE spending all day every day with teenagers. Some days were so rewarding, but others sent me home in tears. And I was pregnant then too, so I understand how a lot of little things can open the flood gates. Keep up the good work, though! I'm sure you're doing great and that the kids love you and you're making a real difference for some of them! Teaching can be a thankless job (kinda like being a mom), but the good days make it worth it!